Can I get a light?

 Is this thing on?

Years ago, I had the idea that I would become a writer.  The only problem with that is that I didn't really have anything to say and I had no motivation when it came to actually writing...or so I thought.  It turns out, I had some pretty entertaining insights way back when, but I pre-edited most of them before posting , so they never saw the light of day.  Fast forward to a couple of minutes ago.  I wondered whatever happened to that old blog and guess what?   It still exists.  Even better, it's still editable.  I was told years ago by some automated service that the blogspace I occupied was being retired, so I made a turn and forgot about it.  

I think we do this a little too often in life. Well, I do, at least.  It's easy to have an energetic spark of a great idea, hoping for something amazing to come of it, and then turn back at the first or second or nth obstacle because it's easier to not do things than to do them.  Well, now I'm older.  I've had a lot of good sparks that have yielded no fire.  I feel stupid for turning back from making a fire.  I've spent the last year, in fact, in a cave of my own making, just avoiding even trying.  But sooner or later you have to face the fact that you're either going to embrace living or you're going to welcome dying.   I'm not ready for the latter.  Little by little, back in my cave, like some Gollum feeling around blindly for that ring, I've been quietly nurturing some of those sparks in a post-covid, post-strike, post-indefinite hiatus in the face of A.I., machine learning, foreign and domestic tax subsidies that take work elsewhere - fog.  I'm tired of just making sparks.  I need some warmth.  I need to spark until my fingers bleed, get a light, feed that flame, make an inferno, warm up some whiskey, and cook up a rabbit.  I might write.  I might draw.   I might just prompt a.i and direct machines to do my bidding.  Whatever happens, I'm going to try to keep the fire lit for a while.  So here we go.